Separation Anxiety

Separation anxiety is a natural part of child development, especially in the early years and sometimes resurfacing during transitions like starting school. It reflects a child’s growing attachment and sense of security with their caregivers.

While this is reassuring from a developmental perspective, it can feel overwhelming for both the child and the parent. Watching your child become distressed at drop-off can stir feelings of guilt, worry, and frustration. These emotions are valid - supporting a child through separation anxiety takes patience and empathy for everyone involved.

Practical Tips for Parents of Primary-Age Children

1. Stay Calm and Confident
   Children often mirror their parents’ emotions. A calm, reassuring tone and confident goodbye signal to your child that they are safe and cared for.

2. Create a Predictable Routine
   Consistent drop-off rituals—like a special hug, a short phrase, or a wave—help children know what to expect and reduce uncertainty.

3. Keep Goodbyes Brief and Positive
   Lingering can increase anxiety. Offer a warm goodbye, remind them when you’ll be back, and then leave promptly.

4. Validate Feelings Without Over-Reassuring
   Acknowledge their feelings (“I know it’s hard to say goodbye”) while gently encouraging coping skills (“You’ll have fun and I’ll see you after school”).

5. Use Transitional Objects
   A small comfort item, like a photo that they can keep in their bag, can help children feel connected to you during the day.

6. Collaborate with Teachers
   Share strategies and concerns with school staff—they can provide extra support during transitions.